Tuesday, September 7, 2010

whoa. major realizations this weekend.

So i'm moving to Austin in 5 months or there abouts, and i'm soooo excited.
New friends, new adventures, new city to figure out, new people to love where they're at.

I need to work on somethings myself. I'd really been slacking on my weight loss the last month, school has been a majorrrrr stressor, and will continue to be until i pass NCLEX-PN and get a job! So i've got to learn to handle my emotions and stress in the RIGHT WAY. But this weekend in Austin, was a major realization for me in several ways.

I'm tired of being the fat sister, i'm tired of having to shop in the fat people store, i'm tired of feeling like people are staring at me, and i'm just plain tired of being lazy, and not having any energy to do anything, and i'm tired of being cranky when i'm with my family, due to their wanting to do things, and me wanting to be lazy, eat, or sleep. ENOUGH. I've had enough of this! And whoa that was a seriously awesome run-on sentence :)

So back to commitment, and asking God for the grace and courage each day to persevere, and to not stuff my face emotionally. So far the last 2 days since i've been home have been great. I normally when i get home sit in the living room and veg out, but the last 2 days even when i walk through the living room, i feel tempted to eat my face off, so i am doing my best to avoid that temptation, and staying away from the living room / kitchen as much as possible!

I'll be moving to a city, and i want to have a fresh start. I want to be who God created me to be, and not just some lazy person. I'm ready to be free, and loving, and happy and genuine about it, and not just faking it. Okay so i don't fake it normally, but lately i've just been way stressed out, and have not wanted to hangout or go anywhere. Not cool. Not me.

As always, frequent encouragement is greatly appreciated :)

1 comment:

Jen said...

i admire your honesty, brit. it's a beautiful thing.

i'll be praying for you! love you!