Tuesday, August 18, 2009

what's up?

My heart just wants an answer. I feel called to certain aspects of marriage, religious life, and the single life. I just want to know what God wants of me.

I just have to keep discerning God's will for my life.
I am so confused by life and what it throws at me.

One moment i feel confirmed in discerning my vocation to religious life, the next moment i feel that God is not calling me there. AHHHHHHH! I just want a freaking lightning bolt from God to hit me on the head.

I am scared to commit myself wholely and completely to religious life. I have never imagined myself being a sister since before this past year. I know i have to think about it and pray about it or i'll never know if God is calling me there.

I suppose to need to discern God's calling me there wholeheartedly and not being wishy-washy about it. I am nervous and scared that God is really calling me to religious life. I would be required to give up my life and submit to God's will. My whole life i've wanted to be loved by a guy, and be swept off my feet. Maybe the whole time God has wanted to sweep me off of my feet Himself??

Must continue to pray and asking for the grace and courage to surrender.

Monday, August 17, 2009

keep on.

Quick thought:

We rely on God alone to get us where we need to go according to His Will.

We must continually asked The Blessed Mother to help us in our pursuit of God's will and in our pursuit of holiness.

We need to seek God's presence in the Sacraments and receieve them often.
Keep praying, keep praying.

But maybe i should listen to my own advice?

Monday, August 10, 2009

discernment.

Short and sweet.

So i'm discerning religious life again. I thought a knew what God wanted. He likes to throw curveballs my way.

Please pray for me.